Your Man Just Hit on Me…

A situation that comes up more often than anyone would like to admit is the one where your boyfriend, fiance or husband actually hits on a good friend of yours. It’s definitely one of the more humiliating things that can happen to anyone and it’s also one that’s very difficult to know how to handle. There are many things that come to mind at first, but there are also other things to consider before making an immediate decision.

To begin with, you need to consider the source. Is the person telling you that your man just hit on her a reliable person? Or is she someone that has been known to be jealous of you in the past and has lied to you on more than one occasion? If that’s the case, you’ll want some definitive proof that she’s not lying to you this time before you start throwing your man’s clothes out onto the front lawn. Witnesses would be ideal but they usually aren’t part of the equation as even a man stupid enough to hit on his woman’s friend will be smart enough to do it privately. So you’ll have to take another route in sniffing out the truth.

The best method to try is taking them both by surprise. Get them both together in front of you and confront him with what you’ve been told. Unless your man is an exceptional liar, you’ve probably noticed little things he does when he’s not being completely truthful with you. Watch him closely because you don’t want to miss that first involuntary response from him when you make the initial accusation. You should be able to tell if he’s guilty as charged.

Now, if he DID actually hit on your friend, you’re most likely going to want to know why. Ask the question if you really want the answer. But you’re still going to need to decide whether he stays or goes. Can you ever trust him again? Probably not. Has this ever happened before while you’ve been together? It may have. Was he drunk when he made the pass? Does it really matter? The bottom line is that he was TRYING to cheat on you and that’s not acceptable in a monogamous relationship.

So unless you want to entertain the idea of threesomes and swapping, this is one man that you probably will want to send on his way. Don’t put yourself through the agony of worrying about whether or not he can be trusted around your friends. You should be able to have attractive friends without limiting yourself to only those that probably will be old maids until they leave the earth. There should be trust between the two of you and if you’ve got to worry about whether or not he’s in the hall bathroom trying to feel up your best friend, it’s simply not worth it. Help him pack and take away his door key. Then you can find someone that’s worthy of you and who won’t behave like a wild animal in heat with anyone other than you.