Blind Dates

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Blind dates can be a hit-or miss proposition. Here are our best tips for making the most of your blind date experiences:

Blind Dates Aren’t Always Nightmares

Blind dates have always received a bad rep for the most part. These are events that truly frighten people whether they’ve ever been on a blind date or not. That’s because, many times, they were set up by thoughtless people that didn’t even really consider how much the potential couple may actually have in common. Admittedly, these types of blind dates CAN and usually ARE complete nightmares, but it doesn’t have to always be that way.

In this current age of dating services and online dating websites, blind dates are almost the norm now. Of course, you DO have the option of getting to know the person you’re considering going on a date with prior to the date itself because of the online contact between the two of you. There’s chatting, exchange of emails, and even phone calls, if you want. By the time you actually meet for coffee or dinner, you’ve got somewhat of an idea about the person you’re meeting.

True blind dates are an entirely different matter. These happen when your best friend sets you up with her brother in law, cousin in law, guy from her husband’s office, or a variety of other choices. You’ve never laid eyes on this guy and know absolutely NOTHING about him, yet, you’ll be having dinner with him at your friend’s home. It is blind dates of this sort that can be trouble. If you haven’t been consulted at all prior to this date, it can be even worse.

However, look at it from another viewpoint. Suppose that your friend, sister, or whoever is setting you up on this blind date, has spoken at length with you about the qualities you must have in any man that you would consider having a relationship with. Suppose, also, that this person has spent time telling you all about the man that you’ll be meeting. In fact, you almost feel as if you know this man by the time the actual date comes about. Assume that the man in question has also undergone the same process regarding you. When it’s these things that have been considered before a blind date, there’s a very good chance that you and this new man will hit it off.

Another thing that is a better idea for blind dates is to double date. So when you meet this new man, you know that there won’t be any chances of those uncomfortable silences when you don’t know what to say. If you’ve got really good friends, they’ll know if the time comes that they should make themselves scarce and let the two of you get better acquainted. On the other hand, they’ll also be able to see if the entire exercise is one in futility, and they’ll know to call it a night at an appropriate time.

When there’s enough preparation beforehand, many blind dates turn out to be very successful and can even end in marriage. The thing to remember is that they must be orchestrated in just the right way to stand a chance of working out.

Personality Plus: Beauty is Only Skin Deep

Just about everyone is familiar with the old joke about a guy telling his friend that his girlfriend wants to set him up with a friend of hers. The friend asks what the friend of the girlfriend looks like. The guy’s friend says “She’s got a GREAT personality.” His friend looks at him and says “So she’s a dog, huh?” While that’s a very rude and disrespectful joke, it seems to have become the basis that all blind dates are founded upon. So what does that say about someone with a great personality?

There are much fewer physically beautiful people in the world than there are normal, or ordinary, people. That lessens the odds that you’ll actually hook up with one of these physically perfect individuals. However, there are many attractive people in the world that you have a good chance of meeting and having a relationship. A good number of THOSE people are going to have engaging personalities that enhance their physical appearance even more.

Nearly everyone has known a few people at some point in their lives that are plain, and some that are even vastly unattractive. However, they have such amazing energy and personalities that they appear to be much more attractive than they actually are. These people are in high demand by others. People want to be around them, date them, and be involved with them, in any way that will allow them to be in the sphere of these lovely individuals. What is it that makes these people so popular and sought after?

Surprisingly enough, it’s their personalities.

The kind of person that someone IS nearly always means more in the end than what someone LOOKS like. It’s true that beauty really is only skin deep in many cases. Beautiful people don’t always have beautiful personalities. This is something that becomes evident very early upon meeting these people. Vanity isn’t an attractive quality and neither is snobbery.

A lot of beautiful people tend to believe that they should only be around OTHER physically beautiful people. These individuals are actually doing the rest of the world of normal people a huge favor by believing that. This avoids a lot of hurt feelings and insults among those people that are considered ordinary.

Something that is very important in a person is having a great personality. In fact, it’s difficult to fathom how you can truly love someone that’s devoid of humanity, no matter how beautiful they appear on the outside. If these people are ugly on the inside, they’re hideous on the outside. Physical perfection does little to fully hide a horrible personality once you get to know the person.

This is something you really should think about the next time someone tries to set you up on a date with a person with a good personality. No, that person may not be winning any beauty contests, but if they’re good hearted, funny, and smart, you shouldn’t write them off simply because they’re not physically perfect. You may find yourself in love before you know it.

How to Make Blind Dates Work for You

Nearly everyone talks badly about blind dates, and there’s usually a reason for that. What typically happens is you’ve been dateless and on your own for a while and people start to notice. These are usually your happily married best friends, sister, mother, aunt, grandmother, and so on. Rarely do you find men interested in setting up their single buddies with someone unless they are being spurred on by their female better half.

No matter who is doing the arranging, blind dates have developed a bad rep over the years.  You know those jokes about “What does she look like?” and the answer is “She has a really great personality.”  That one seemed to alert the guy being set up that the girl he was meeting might be a lot of fun but she was definitely lacking on looks.

If you’re still living in the past, you should push that fast forward button and consider that things today may not be as bad as they used to be when it comes to blind dates.

These days, it’s perfectly acceptable to let someone you TRUST set you up on a blind date. The word in that sentence is “trust.” For example, if you and your sister don’t get along that well, you may not want to allow her to arrange a date for you with someone sight unseen. On the other hand, your best friend will most likely have your best interests at heart. Therefore, it’s probably fine to let her fix you up with someone she feels would be perfect for you. While your sister may be mean and set you up with a guy that you would just as soon not want to be seen in public with, your friend that loves you will want you to ADORE the man she has found for you.

Blind dates shouldn’t carry the stigma they once did. These days, a blind date is a very respectable way to meet someone with whom you may share common interests. More often than not, a blind date now means that someone has taken two people they care about a lot and have found a way to introduce them to each other. There’s no “throwing them together” as in the past. Now, it’s done in a very comfortable and easy going environment so that if things don’t work out, no one is embarrassed.

All of these reasons are why you should seriously give blind dating a shot. If you trust the person that’s doing the arranging, there’s no need for you to worry about it or be wary of it. Look at it as a way to get out for an evening and have a good time, and possibly a delicious free dinner. If things go well between you and the arranged date, you may end up with more than just a pleasant evening. Many happily married couples first met on a blind date and they highly recommend it as a way for singles to meet.

How to Get Out of a Bad Date

You look out the window as his sleek, luxury car pulls into your driveway. During that casual encounter at a mutual friend’s party, you didn’t really memorize every detail about him.

As you watch him walk up the path to your door, you notice that he is tall, well dressed and looks promising. In fact, he looks so good that you ditch the old dress and pull out something a bit more chic.
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Top 10 Blind Dating Tips

Going on a blind date? Here are a few tips for making the most of your blind dating experience:

• The best time for a blind date is lunch, or if it must be in the evening meet for drinks or coffee rather than dinner. If the meeting is scheduled to be short and casual, you’ll find far less pressure put on your blind date. You also won’t have to be concerned about the propriety of who is to pay for the dinner.
• Choose someplace quiet and someplace where you won’t run into several friends who stop and say hello. This is the time to pay attention to your date, not everyone else.
• Etiquette is an important part of your best blind date and an important tip. Avoid sarcasm, talking badly about other people, telling rude or crude jokes, using racial or ethnic slurs, and making suggestive comments. Especially if you are the male, the latter will make a very nervous blind date – and one probably not destined to see you again.
• Avoid controversial topics. A blind date isn’t the place to discuss how much you hate organized religion or how liberal your politics are. The exception is if this blind date is made after you are brought together online or otherwise and have determined that you have these attitudes in common.
• Courtesy, above all, is the rule for a blind date, no matter how disappointed you might be at the person sitting across the table from you.
• Ignore your cell phone calls. Better yet, you should turn your cell phone off, unless you are prohibited. The latter might be a physician on call, a police officer and so forth. If that is the case, the first thing you’ll want to do is explain that you might have to respond to some emergency call, but you’ll ignore all others.
• Your blind date shouldn’t be the one night search for your true love. Talk about pressure! Our tip is to avoid that kind of stress by telling yourself that this meeting is the chance to go out and have a good time and maybe meet somebody nice. Perhaps you won’t find your perfect mate, but you just might meet a new friend.
• Listen to your blind date – that’s an important tip. Listening at the first meeting is much more important than talking. Don’t avoid disclosing enough about yourself to seem open and honest, but don’t monopolize the conversation.
• Come armed with questions to keep the conversation flowing. These questions should be open-ended, to get your blind date talking. Asking, “What brought you to Boston?” could elicit a lot more conversation than, “How many years have you been in Boston?”
• While you might be dating someone that your friends know, don’t ask too many questions before you actually meet. Make your own decisions, rather than letting someone else’ biases negatively coloring your opinion before the blind date even happens.