Moping Around Over Your Ex Gets You Nowhere

The breakup of a relationship can be one of the most devastating experiences in anyone’s life. It’s painful and it’s hard to get over. You’re upset and hurt and may even feel that you’ll never meet anyone else again as long as you live. You mope around the house all day and night, crying and remembering all the special times you had together. Your friends and family members may be starting to avoid you if your depressing and negative mood is beginning to wear thin on them.

The first thing you’re going to have to do is snap out of it. Yes, this sounds a lot easier said than done, but if you spend all of your time and energy focusing on being depressed over the breakup or wishing and praying that you’ll get back together, you’ll never be able to move forward in your life. Before you start shaking your head, it’s imperative that you understand something. If your ex wanted the breakup, there was a reason for it. He may even already be involved with someone else. Whatever the reason, odds are against it being the passionate reunion scene that you’re probably playing out in your head over and over again. That’s not to say that it doesn’t happen in a small number of cases and in the movies. It’s just meant to jog you into reality.

While you don’t really want to jump into a rebound situation, there’s certainly no reason for you not to get out there and have some fun. The absolute worst thing you can do is to sit at home and dwell on how unhappy you are. There’s nothing to be gained from this at all. While you’re sitting at home and being depressed over something that isn’t going to be yours again, life is simply passing you by.

If you’re not out making a concerted effort to improve the circumstances of your romantic life, then you’re basically stomping your feet in a mud puddle. You’re not happy, but you’re not moving forward, either. There are things you need to be doing to help yourself feel better.

Go out with friends. You can even go out alone. Stay away from places that will remind you of your ex. Find some new places to love. Don’t keep listening to all of “your songs.”  Again, open the door to some new favorite music that won’t remind you of your ex. Get rid of pictures, letters, or gifts that are associated with your ex. If you don’t want to throw them away, at least pack them up, so they’re not in your sight any longer. You can also give them to a trusted friend to hold onto for them.

Make yourself do these things or you’ll be miserable for the rest of your life. Most likely your ex has moved on. You deserve to be able to do that as well and have a life. So please stop moping and move forward into a happier life.

Breaking Up Can Be Easy

Not all relationships are meant to last forever. Many, if not most, are simply stepping stones to the happily ever after relationship that you’ll enjoy at the right time in your life. Admittedly, a lot of break ups are messy and hurt a lot. However, they don’t always have to be that way. This is especially true if the couples involved can see that their relationship has most likely run its course.

Rather than force it and try to resuscitate a dying relationship, it’s usually better to part ways with as much respect for each other as possible. If you stay too long, it will only get worse and you’ll leave hating someone that your sun once set upon.

The first thing to do in a flagging relationship is to gauge just how bad things are and decide if there’s a chance to repair any damage that’s been done. If the answer is yes, then your next step is to begin what you need to do to get things back on track. Many times a relationship can just derail for some reason and there’s still hope that it can be put back together. You and your partner need to decide if that’s the case with your relationship.

The next thing you need to decide is whether or not you care enough to put the effort, energy and work needed to repair your relationship. Believe it or not, sometimes you just fall out of love with someone. It’s not something that either of you did. It’s just something that is. This is another of those cases where you don’t resuscitate it if it’s truly dead. Neither of you will get anything positive from this. Part as friends while you still can.

Sometimes the actions of a partner can lead you to the decision of ending the relationship. This can be many things:

• Some partners pack up and leave every time there’s an argument. Of course, they always come back but, seriously, who wants to go through that all the time?
• Others are abusive in different ways, whether it’s physical, mental, emotional or verbal. No one deserves to have to put up with that.
• Then there are the partners that just can’t seem to stop cheating. Obviously, then, you and your relationship aren’t very important to your partner.

Actually, any or all of these actions that are performed repeatedly can erode any feelings of love that you thought you had for this person. Believe it or not, their actions are helping you to make a hard decision that much easier.

Breakups can be easy once you realize that’s what needs to happen. In fact, that can sometimes be all that you need to find the words to say and the strength to walk away. Depending on the reasons for the breakup, it may even be possible to remain friends, or to become friends at some point in the future. Many times you have to follow your head rather than your heart because your head usually knows what you have to do. All you need to do is just listen to what it’s telling you.