Beautiful and Alone

Many times you may remember seeing absolutely gorgeous women sitting alone in a bar. You may have known physically flawless women that rarely had a date on the weekends. While it may not make sense, it’s definitely true that many beautiful women spend a large portion of their lives alone. Once you dig into this phenomena a bit, though, you’ll start to see why it happens more than people think.

For one thing, and this is very common, lots of men are intimidated by women that are just incredibly stunning. This intimidation leads them to believe that these women would never give them a second glance. They don’t want to be shot down so they end up not ever approaching the women of their dreams. Instead, they just keep watching from afar and fantasizing about what it would be like to date them.

Something else about beautiful women is that some of them are assumed to be very self-centered and, therefore, will only date certain types of men. They don’t want to be seen with the ordinary guys. In other words, if a man doesn’t have lots of money and a hot car, they shouldn’t even approach women like this. They will definitely be shot down. Now, this isn’t to say that ALL beautiful women are self-centered. There are ordinary looking women that can be just as self-centered, although one might wonder why they feel they deserve to be.

The point is, even if you feel that you’re a less than ordinary man, you should always give the beautiful women a chance. Very often, a gorgeous woman would love to be approached by an intelligent man with a great sense of humor even if he doesn’t look like the stereotypical movie star. Many times, as long as that man is clean, neat and smells nice, a beautiful woman would be more than pleased to spend time with him.

So, if that man sounds a bit like you, why are you not approaching that beautiful woman sitting all alone at the bar nursing a drink and looking ever so lonely? Unless you look like the Elephant Man and have the personality of a cave man, she just may welcome your company. But that’s not something you’ll ever know unless you try it. Sure, there’s a chance that she may not be interested and blow you off, but there’s at least a fifty percent chance that she’ll smile at you and accept a drink from you.

Now, if she does turn out to be one of those women that has ice water pumping through her veins and isn’t interested unless you’re a millionaire driving a Maserati, at least you’ll understand why she’s sitting in a bar drinking alone. However, if you get your feet wet, so to speak, the next time you might not be so nervous about approaching a great looking woman. After all, once you’ve been shot down, you’ll know how it feels and will know that it can’t kill you.

Besides, if nothing else, you may be starting the relationship of your dreams. If not, you might at least make a really wonderful friend.

How to Get the Most from Your Online Dating Search

Once you’ve decided to take the plunge and get involved in online dating, there are things you can do to make your search for the perfect dating partner much easier. If you’re familiar with the term SEO, or Search Engine Optimization, you know that’s the secret ingredient to having a successful business. Some people have started to bring this very technique into their online dating search.

There are some things that have come to light with experts in these matters and they have been proven to work when it comes to landing the man you’re looking online. Once you try these things, you’ll see the difference in the type of men you attract.

To begin with, you should wear red in your profile picture. It seems that men are more attracted to red than to any other color. Since physical attraction is the beginning spark of most relationships, your profile picture is a vital part of getting an online date. Take whatever time is needed to get a flattering picture of yourself as you look now. Don’t use an old photo and try to Photoshop it. That’s simply not fair and the man you meet for a date is going to notice that you don’t look the same now. So, use only a little makeup, show moderate cleavage and a deliver a high wattage smile. Look directly into the camera and take the picture from the waist up.

Commit to a certain number of visits to your dating profile every day. Each time you visit your profile, change a little something in it. That will make you turn up new all the time in the database of the site. A lot of online dating sites maintain a list of new users, recently logged in users, and users that have recently updated their profiles that shows up on their homepage. As long as you keep visiting your profile, you’ll keep being seen on the homepage. This also indicates how serious you are about finding a good relationship.

The next thing you can use to your advantage is the way you handle your messages. Any messages that you send to your potential dates should be on a more personal note. Don’t use a generic message to send out to every man that messages you. Keep it specific for each man that you’re chatting to based on what their profiles say about them and what caught your eye. In addition, when you’re describing yourself, use some simple keywords that show up all the time in searches. These can be things like love, sports, painting, cooking, dancing and more. Don’t lie, either.

The tips mentioned here aren’t very difficult to follow but they can make all the difference in the world as to whether or not you get the man you would most like to go on a date with. All of these things are geared to bring you to the attention of the men that you would consider dating potential. Try them out and see just how far they’ll get you.

How to Tell if He’s Mr. Wrong

So much emphasis is made on finding Mr. Right that sometimes it’s hard to see that it’s Mr. Wrong you’re having a drink with. While some of the signs are rather obvious, there are other ones that sort of get bypassed until it’s almost too late. Keep a look out for these signs that he’s Mr. Wrong:

• He talks about all the strange sex he’s had through the years and then tells you that he’s so happy you live nearby because now the two of you can get together for casual sex. (Seriously?)
• He mentions during conversation that you look so young, and then quickly follows that with how much he loves young girls. (Should you leave immediately or call the cops?)
• You’re in bed with an older, European man and having a pretty good time. Suddenly, you realize he’s wearing panties. He might just be kinky or he might be sleazy. (Since it’s hard to tell, you may want to use your intuition.)
• So you’re out with a guy at a theme park and he wins a huge stuffed animal. You think he should give it to you or to some little kid but he petulantly refuses and carries it around the rest of the day. The stuffed animal has its own seat between you on the plane going home. (What a big baby!)
• He’s got a low class job that he’s been doing because it’s fun for several years, yet he seems to always have plenty of money. It’s a good chance that he’s doing something shady on the side. (You don’t need to take any chances with this one.)
• What about the guys that want to control everything you do? For example, he instructs you on the “correct” way to hold your knife and fork while you eat and demands that you start eating “his” way. (Just because he’s from another country doesn’t mean his way is the only way.)
• On your first date, he takes you to dinner along with his mother. (Sure, a man needs to love his mother, but this feels more like a Mommy’s Boy.)
• He actually POUTS when he doesn’t get his way. (Do you WANT to be in a relationship with a child?)
• He makes snide remarks about all of your friends, and he’s not even all that careful about them not hearing him. (He’s already trying to control you by alienating you from your friends. This is sort of scary.)

Some of these are obvious and others aren’t so obvious. That’s why you need to pay close attention in the beginning when you’re dating someone new. If you notice something that seems a bit “off,” don’t assume that it’s nothing and that you’re just overreacting. That’s rarely the case. Keep in mind that when you’re able to spot Mr. Wrong early on, you won’t waste any more time on him when you could be out searching for Mr. Right. Do yourself a favor and don’t let new guys get away with anything that bothers you or makes you unhappy.

Competing with a Deceased Partner

With people living longer these days, chances are that members of the older population will find themselves dating widows or widowers at some point. This can be either a lovely and happy coupling or it can be a very sticky situation. It totally depends on whether or not the living partner has made peace with the passing of their partner and is ready to move on in life. Unfortunately, that’s not usually something you’ll find out until you actually go out with this person.  Even worse, it may not even become evident until you’ve enjoyed several dates that you’re competing with a deceased partner.

Basically, there’s usually not a way to successfully compete with a partner that has passed on. One of the main reasons for this is that once a loved one has died, he or she becomes a saint in the eyes of the partner that was left behind. Friends and family members are often stunned at the transformation of a deceased partner. This person could have been the meanest tempered, most abusive individual that ever walked the earth, but once they’re gone, their surviving partner remembers them as sweet tempered people that never did any wrong in their lives. If you’re dating someone that has selective memory, you’re in trouble right out of the gate. Nothing you do is ever going to measure up to the deceased saint.

Now, if you’re about to start dating a widow or widower, there are some clues that will help you early on before you waste too much time with this person.  The time that has passed since the partner died will mean a lot in whether the surviving partner is ready to start dating. For some people, six months is plenty of mourning time. For others, ten years may not be enough. So be sure to find out in some discreet way how long the deceased has been gone.

Something else that can be very telling is the interior of the widow or widower’s home.  If you walk in and find a very prominently placed shrine to the deceased partner, you’ll probably want to keep your contact to just the one date.  When there are still tons of pictures sitting around of the good old days, there’s a good chance that the living partner is still dwelling in the past.

If every other sentence from your date begins with “When my Harold was alive” or “Anna always did this or that,” you should probably be prepared for this to be a short term friendship.  This is not the attitude of someone who is ready to move forward in life. You’re not being uncaring or rude if you decide not to wait around, either. You’re simply being realistic.

On the other hand, if you hook up with someone that misses their deceased partner, but speaks in the present and the future of what they would like in their life, you just may have captured a jewel. It’s definitely worth a shot as both of you could have a great chance at a happy future together.

Are You a Candidate for Speed Dating?

In this day and age of various ways to meet someone for dating and possibly more, one of the oddest ways of doing this has stuck around and even expanded itself. It’s a fun little exercise known as Speed Dating, and is probably among the most unique methods of meeting new people there is. People seem to either love it or hate it, but rarely is anyone indifferent.

Speed Dating isn’t exactly “dating” but rather more of an interview process between two people to see if they may want to get to know each other better. These events are organized by various dating agencies. Some even specialize in Speed Dating events. They can be for any legal age or sexual orientation.  These events can be for a set age range, older women and younger men, older men and younger women, and everything else you can think of. Whatever taste exists in dating, there’s a Speed Dating event for it.

The way these work is people are either invited to participate or they discover an event on their own and want to register for it. There’s a fee charged per person and there’s usually a limit as to how many people can attend a single event. The number of attendees is an even one for obvious reasons. These are the people that are going to be spending a few minutes with each other during the Speed Dating event to see if they connect.

Usually, there are tables set up so that everyone sits across from each other when it’s their turn to chat. There will be a sound of some sort like a bell or whistle to indicate that the “dating” between the couples will begin. It’s during this time that the couples speak to each other for anywhere from three to eight minutes. They typically introduce themselves to each other and then either volunteer a bit of information about themselves or ask questions of each other. At the end of the time limit, the bell or whistle will sound again and new couples pair up to repeat the process.

At the end of the event, there is usually something social set up for drinks and snacks. During this time, anyone that was impressed with someone else they met through the speed date will give that name to the organizers of the event. This means that the organizers have permission to contact the person on behalf of the interested party.  If the person contacted isn’t interested, he or she will state that and it ends there. However, if there’s interest, then these two people will be given contact information so they can arrange for an actual date together.

Whether or not you’re a candidate for this way of meeting someone depends on the type of person you are and what your preferences are when it comes to getting to know someone. If you’re open minded and like to have some unique fun when it comes to the dating process, Speed Dating just may be a great way for you to meet someone that’s just as much fun as you are.

Dating Safety Tips

When you talk to older people about “the good old days,” they’ll all tell you that things have really changed over the years when it comes to safety. Teens used to date by having a milk shake at the local ice cream shop, or going to a movie and having a hamburger before or after. No one worried so much about things such as date rape, kidnapping and murder because you happened to have agreed to go out with the wrong person. The biggest worries back then were not getting caught at the local Lover’s Lane or missing curfew.

These days, there are so many things to take into consideration when dating someone new. This becomes especially serious when you factor in that there is now online dating and simply carrying over an online connection into a real world meeting can have risks. There are now very real concerns when it comes to dating. This is particularly true with online dating. You should always remember that people can be whoever or whatever they want to be on the Internet. They don’t have to be truthful. The only thing they have to do is to convince someone they’re interested in that they are who they say they are.

Therefore, one of the first things you may want to do if you’re thinking about dating someone you’ve become acquainted with online is make sure that they’re who they say they are. This can be done several ways. One of them is to have them checked out through a private investigator. This is a rather reliable way of ensuring that someone isn’t trying to pull a fast one on you but it can also be rather costly. There are also online services that help you check out someone that are maybe less reliable but are more affordable and better than not checking at all.

Another method you may employ is chatting with them by webcam. In this way, you can at least see them and be able to see what they look like. If you’re good at reading people, seeing them face to face in this way may help you tell if they’re being truthful with you about who they are. Granted, this doesn’t ensure that you’re completely safe but at least you know a little more about who you’ve been chatting with.

If you do decide to meet face to face, always meet the person somewhere. Don’t be giving out directions to your home right away. This first meeting should take place in a very active location with plenty of people around.  You may also want to consider taking a friend with you the first time so that it’s clear that someone knows where you went and who you met there.

If this meeting goes well, and you feel as if you’re comfortable setting up another date, take some more precautions and make sure that your date knows you’re doing so. They may not be thrilled with your safety tactics but they should understand. If they get unreasonable about it, you have every reason to be suspicious and cut off all contact with them.

Basically, use your common sense as well as any intuition you may have, and you should be fine.

The Importance of Date Night

There comes a time in every relationship when things start to become normal and routine. This is a fact of life that couples will eventually have to learn to live with, but there is something that you can do to bring back some of that excitement you felt in the beginning.

The “Date Night” is something that can turn that routine relationship back around to something unique and exciting, even if it is only once a week. This will help you and your partner reconnect on an emotional level again and it’s a lot of fun as well.

The first thing you need to do is understand that this is a “Date”.   This isn’t just you and your partner going out just to get out of the house on a Friday night. You can do that anytime you want. This is a night that you need to plan something fun and entertaining and change it up if you are able to. You don’t have to go to the same restaurant every week and then just go home and watch some TV before falling asleep. What kind of a date would that have been for you or your partner when you first met?

If you live in a place that has a decent night life or activities that you can do in the evening, then you will need to pick one that you would like to do. This is a bit more difficult in smaller towns but you can always use your imagination to find something you can do together. Think back to when you were in high school and all the things you used to do back then when you went out on dates. You will be surprised at the things you can do if you put your mind to it.

Make sure that you are doing things you both enjoy. If you are constantly picking things that only one of you enjoys, then it makes the other person bored, and that is never a good thing. Sit down and discuss all the things that you enjoy doing and find the ones that the two of you can have fun doing together. If you can’t find a couple of things you both enjoy, then choose one that one of you likes and let the other person choose one they like for the next “date night.”  It’s only fair, after all.

If you have children, you will need to make them understand that this is an important night for the two of you. You can always have a family night thrown in before “date night” and allow your children to pick what they would like to do to help them understand. This will help them realize that the two of you need to get out of the house once in a while as well and will show them what a true loving couple is like. Allowing them to see a happy couple will help them build strong and lasting relationships of their own later on in life as well.

What Men Want in Women They Are Dating

There are plenty of debates as to what men want in the women they date and have relationships with. You probably have known some of those women that really don’t seem to be anything special but they’re never without a date, and the men they date are pretty hot.

The big question comes in what do men see in these women? Part of the answer comes with regard to the type of man that is being attracted to these women. A mature man that’s grounded on all levels will want to find a woman for a real relationship. So what does a REAL man want in a woman?

1. Real men want women that are playful. Something that drives men wild and encourages a deeper connection is simply playing. Men enjoy being playful. They were taught to connect with others through action. Sadly, most women seem to forget or not know about that and try to talk their way into a relationship. Remember, that it’s not your words that will attract a man. It’s the experiences that you make with him. Things like playing or watching sports together will get his attention must faster.

2. Real men want women that are independent. A lot of women believe that men want a “weak” woman that makes them feel powerful and smart. This couldn’t be more false. A real man wants a woman that inspires them because of the awesome things she’s got happening in her life. They want women with purpose other than just being in a relationship. Real men aren’t intimidated by success and independence. In fact, they’re drawn to it. Don’t make him your world and drop your own responsibilities, interests and friends. But when you’re with him, BE with him.

3. Real men want emotionally mature women. When you attract a man, eventually you’re going to disagree on something. A mature woman doesn’t criticize or blame a man for the way she feels. She shares her feelings honestly so that a man can understand her better. This makes her more attractive to a real man. The way a woman handles her emotions is something that men look for when deciding if they’re going to get serious or not.

4. Real men want women they’re intensely attracted to. Men aren’t afraid of committing to a relationship. They’re afraid of being stuck in a relationship with a woman where there’s no real passion. Common ways women kill men’s attraction to them is through trying too hard or assuming the relationship is serious too soon. Just relax and let things happen as they’re meant to.

If you truly want to attract a real man into your life for a relationship, be playful, independent, passionate, and emotionally mature. Keep things fun and passionate in the relationship from the very beginning.

There’s nothing more attractive to men than women that know to have fun and relax. Just do some playful teasing, humor, being unpredictable and good old fashion flirting. You’ll be amazed at how many high quality men you’ll attract in this way.

How to Know When It’s Time to Start Dating Again

One of the questions that come up time and time again following either a divorce or the death of a spouse is how to know when it’s time to start dating again. This is a tricky situation because if you start dating too soon, you’re doomed to fail. Not only that, people will start talking about you in a not so flattering way. On the other hand, if you wait too long to take the plunge, you may find that you just have lost interest in dating. There’s a delicate balance here and you need to find it.

There are some signs that will point you in the right direction when it comes to knowing when it’s time to step out into the world of dating. The first one of these signs is that you’re no longer in love with your ex-spouse. For a widowed partner, the love may still be there but when you can stop comparing everyone you may go out with to your deceased partner, then you’re ready to get proactive about dating.

In addition, with a divorce behind you, it may be difficult to stop comparing, in a negative way, everyone that you may feel an interest in dating. In other words, when you feel that you have totally dealt with and put the past where it belongs, you’re ready to get your feet wet again, and start taking some steps to meet the right dating partners.

Trust is another thing that comes up. It may seem that divorced people have more trouble with that issue than widowed ones but that’s not exactly the case. Obviously, a divorce can bring on many doubts about starting a new relationship. So, if you’re divorced, that’s an issue you need to resolve before saying yes to that first cup of coffee or dinner date. However, if you’re widowed, you may doubt your ability to find another partner that you can trust as much as you trusted your late spouse. You got comfortable in your marriage and now you just don’t want to start all over again.

Work on your self-confidence if you don’t feel that you’re in “dating” shape. If you feel that you need to lose a little weight or tone up, start eating healthy and hit the gym a few days a week. For older women, gray hair can be hidden. In that same vein, you may consider a new haircut or style to enhance your looks. Go shopping and get some new clothes that will flatter you and make you feel good about yourself. Once you’ve invested a bit in some self-improvement methods, you may find that you’re even excited about getting out and about.

If you’re really worried about going out with people you don’t know, have a friend or relative introduce you to someone eligible. Even if that date doesn’t work out to be anything important, it will at least give you a practice run. After that, you’ll be ready to re-enter the dating game.  A great place to start testing the dating waters again if you are over 50 is All Senior Dating.  Join free today and read our tips on how to set up a great dating profile to get started.

Bringing Your Gay Lover Home to Meet the Family

Nothing is better than finally meeting the partner of your dreams after you’ve firmly and completely come out of the closet. Families are usually split about half and half these days when it comes to how they react to being told that their son or daughter is gay. Some families are very supportive of their child’s lifestyle while others are hurt, angry and in denial.

Sadly, many people lose their families over their sexual orientation. For those that still have their families in their lives, there will come a day when you’ll want to bring home your lover to meet them. The only reason that this can be a bit different than any straight person introducing the love of his or her life to the family is because there are so many varied degrees of acceptance that a family can be at.

First of all, if you have a supportive and loving family that wants only your happiness, you’ll have an easy time of it when bringing home your lover for the first time. All you’ll need to do is to call your family well ahead of time so that they can prepare. This is no different from a straight person preparing to bring home a lover. You’re just being considerate in case there’s any cleaning or cooking that your family wants to do before your arrival. When you and your partner arrive, introduce him or her to your family and allow them some time to get acquainted.

If you’ve only recently come out to your family and they’re still grappling with the news, you may need to tread a bit lightly. Make a date for you and your partner to meet with your family ahead of time. This gives you a chance to gauge how your family really is taking the news of your lifestyle. If you feel safer on your own territory, host a lunch or dinner at your home. In this way, you give your family an escape route if they start feeling uncomfortable. Keep things light and don’t be overly affectionate with your partner until everyone has adjusted.

For families that simply refuse to accept who you are, there’s not a lot you can do. In fact, you probably don’t want to subject someone you love to the treatment that he or she will most likely receive at the hands of homophobic family members. Tell your partner about your family. Show him or her photos and tell stories about your childhood. Let your partner get acquainted with your family through your words. In that way, if your family ever turns around and decides to love you and accept you unconditionally, your partner will at least be somewhat familiar with them.

Families are meant to be important. However, if your family cannot seem to accept you and your newfound happiness, you may need to move forward in your life without them as a part of it. It’s not your fault. You deserve to be happy. If they can’t be happy with you, they don’t truly love you. Move on with your partner.

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