Is it Love, Lust or a Nervous Breakdown?

David Coverdale of the band Whitesnake sang “Is this love that I’m feeling?” many years ago, and this truly does seem to be the age old question that still doesn’t have a clear cut answer to it. You experience so many of the same emotions when you’re first falling in love as you do when you simply are lusting for someone. It can be next to impossible to determine which you’re feeling until you go ahead and give into your lust only to find out that it burns itself out in a short time.

Actually, in the beginning, you’re most likely not going to know whether you’re falling in love or not.  Both love and lust bring about such reactions as:

• Severe butterflies in the stomach
• Not being able to eat
• Not being able to sleep
• Thinking of nothing else but this new person
• Talking of nothing else but this new person and driving your friends away with your constant chatter on the subject
• Leaping to answer the phone whenever it rings only to hate the person on the other end when it’s not the object of your affection
• Becoming panicked when you don’t hear from your obsession for a full day
• Facebook stalking
• In person stalking
• Finding even the most appalling habit this person has to be cute and endearing

There are more signs, but you get the idea. These are all symptoms of new love, infatuation, lust, or that you’re possibly losing your mind. When you think about it, some of these could very well be signs of a mental illness.

The issue will be trying to figure out just what’s happening to you and whether you should try to get a new relationship off the ground, have sex a few times and then leave, or see your doctor. There are a few helpful hints that might aid you in deciding whether you’re in love or just want to have sex with this person. Then you can make the decision.

First of all, give it a little time to see if your obsession calms down and morphs into something a bit saner. If it does, and you still have favorable feelings and an attraction to this person, chances are you’re on the road to a possible long term relationship. In fact, giving the situation enough time is truly the only way to tell if you’ve found a great person that you’re in love with, or whether you simply were scratching an itch.

A big thing to watch for is if those terrible habits that were so cute before have now begun to appall you, embarrass you and simply irritate you. If this is the case, you probably don’t love this person after all. The biggest sign, however, that you’re ready to move on is when the thought of sex with your former obsession makes you nauseous. When that happens, it’s time to close this particular door and walk away.