Dating Issues While Living With Your Parents

In this day and age of economic distress, it’s not surprising at all for adults to move back home with their parents. They can pay a certain amount of money to help with the rent or mortgage, utility bills and food. For the most part, this can be a pretty good arrangement, even if not an ideal one. Everyone can live comfortably and not be overly stressed about how the bills are going to be paid or if they’re going to be on the street in search of a refrigerator box and a quiet corner in an alley somewhere.

There are some dating issues that can come up from time to time, though, when you live with your parents. This usually comes into play when you meet someone that you want to take things to the next level with and don’t exactly have the privacy to do so. Not all families are like the television show with Frasier and his very understanding father. The privacy issues become even worse if you have a bedroom within the house.

If you must live with parents again, it’s better if you can have a separate entrance to your living space. Sometimes homes are large enough to include basement apartments or even guest houses on the property. In those cases, the issue of privacy really becomes a non-issue unless your parents tend to be the type to mind your business. Obviously, you don’t want them bursting in on you in bed with someone you’ve spent the night with.

Some parents are smart enough to realize that if you’re 25 years old, you’re an adult with the right to do your own thing. They treat you as an adult and respect your privacy. If these are your parents, you probably don’t have any dating issues. However, if your parents are those that feel they need to control your life no matter how old you are, there will be some serious problems, and you may want to find someone else to bunk with until you can get back on your feet again.

In the event that it’s not possible to resolve boundaries in your parents’ home, that leaves you with the option of going to your date’s home or even a hotel room. That doesn’t have to be as sleazy as it may sound, either. They can be totally romantic occasions, complete with room service and breakfast in bed. However, if you have over protective parents, you’re probably going to want to alert them that you won’t be home that night, or they’ll have the police out looking for you.

Before you ever move in with your parents, sit down and have a talk with them about what you expect regarding boundaries and privacy. Hopefully, you can all reach an agreement to treat each other with respect. During this talk, you’ll be able to tell if this is something that will work or not. If you get the “under my roof” speech, do your best to make other arrangements, or be prepared to give up dating until you’re financially independent again.