Dealing with an Addictive Relationship

You may or may not recognize being in an addictive relationship. The symptoms will be clear but, just like all addicts; you won’t necessarily acknowledge the addiction. It is not easy to deal with this kind of relationship once you’re solidly in it. These relationships don’t produce happiness. In fact, you’ll most likely be miserable with feelings of pain, regret and guilt. You may also be a little angry, bitter and sad.

Addictive relationships are some of the most destructive forces you’ll ever face, and it gets worse the longer it lasts. The hardest part is to admit to yourself that you’re in an addictive relationship. However, it’s the first important step to take. An addictive relationship only makes you stressed and you won’t feel loved or cared for. It just makes you feel worthless, tired, with no self-esteem while making you desperate for affection.

Sadly, addictive relationships are all too common. The reasons they develop are many and varied. You may have watched your parents’ relationship when you were young and thought that was normal even if it wasn’t. Also, you may have not had love and affection when you were a child and you feel it’s normal to be treated this way in a relationship.

If you want to make some positive changes in your life, you’ve got to admit what you’re involved in. It’s common to be in denial and you need to be honest with yourself. If you’re not sure if your relationship is addictive or not, ask yourself if you make excuses for the way your partner behaves or cover up his or her bad behavior to others. If this is normal behavior for you, most likely your relationship is addictive.

When you know this, it’s hoped that you’ll want out of it. The first thing you should do is talk about it. Tell your story to friends or family, if you can. Seek out a relationship counselor.

Sometimes fear keeps you paralyzed. This can be fear that you’ll never find anyone else to love, fear of starting over, fear of getting involved with the same type of partner or fearing that you’ll be alone. Don’t ever fall into the trap of believing that a bad relationship is better than none at all. While you heal from this destructive relationship, your confidence and self-esteem can rebuild.

The most important part of recovering from emotional addiction is to make yourself the priority. Invest time into breaking all of your old bad habits. Look back on previous relationships to find signs of emotional abuse or dependency. If you spot a pattern forming, it’s time to break that as well. Concentrate on what you need and on moving forward. This will help you break those chains of negativity.

Trying to get love from someone who can’t give it is truly pointless. You’ve got to regain control over yourself as well as your environment. That’s when you can break the destructive pattern of addictive relationships and start over.