Don’t Forget to Say I Love You

Many men still have problems saying what they feel unless it’s some form of anger that they’re experiencing. This is responsible for many relationship issues because, whether you like it or not, women LIKE hearing that their men care about them. Yes, that’s right, men. You’re going to HAVE to say I love you.

At this moment, you’re most likely protesting loudly that you do things like clean up after yourself, do the laundry, cook meals, and buy her things for those special occasions. In addition, you’re 100 percent faithful and never look at other women. You have a good job and do your part financially. Now, aren’t those things showing your women that you love them? Sure, it does show them. But you still have to SAY it once in a while.

That doesn’t mean that you can just respond with “Me, too” when she says “I love you.” This doesn’t cut it and you’ve probably seen that hurt look on her face more than once. Yes, you know the one and YOU caused it to be there. Does it really take anything away from you to say those three tiny words once in a while? What would you do if she were on her deathbed and said “I love you?” Would you really let her go into the great beyond with nothing from you except a “Me, too?” If you’re even considering that question, shame on you!

For those men among you that feel it’s not “manly” to say “I love you,” think again. Even those men that are huge Nascar fans, hunt for two or three weeks every season, work on cars, indulge in bodybuilding and never miss a single football game of their favorite teams find time to work in the occasional “I love you” to their wives and girlfriends. So what’s wrong with you that you can’t find it within yourself to tell the woman that’s supposed to be the most important person in your life how you feel about her?

It may be that you have intimacy issues that keep you from being able to make yourself that vulnerable to the one person on earth that you should trust the most. She must have been a very patient and understanding woman to be with you even though you never tell her you love her. Think about how much SHE must love YOU if she’s with you in spite of the fact that you don’t say “I love you.” Doesn’t she deserve to hear that from you at least sometimes?

Something else you should consider while you’re making up excuses for why you don’t say those important words is that there ARE men in the world that don’t have your paralysis. They tell their women they love them all the time! If you don’t start stepping up to the plate once in a while, your wife or girlfriend may find a man who WILL say “I love you,” and won’t keep her guessing as to how he feels. If that happens, you may wish you had spoken up.

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Dating Tips From Dad

Came across a wonderful dating tips article on MSN today. With Father’s Day just around the corner they featured a short article with some dating advice given to young men and women over the years by their fathers.
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Overcoming Shyness Around Women

Most of the time, men are the ones that do the asking for dates. Men have to approach the women, say the right words and hope she accepts the invitation. This is nerve-wracking at best for most guys – especially shy men.

But if you’re sitting at home waiting for her to ask you out, you’re making a big mistake. Chances are, she won’t. If you’re shy and you haven’t been sending signals, she’s not even going to know that you’re interested.

And some women won’t ask a man out just because there’s still that unspoken rule for some that the guy should do the asking. If you fear asking a girl out because you may get rejected, you’re not alone.

It happens, but not asking anyone out is pretty much going to guarantee that you’ll be spending your Saturday nights by yourself or with your Poker buddies for many years to come.

Shyness stems from a fear of rejection. You’re afraid to approach, talk and ask, because she might not show an interest in you. The beauty is that there are literally billions of women on the planet, and many of them are single, within your age range, like the same things you like, and are looking for someone like you.

The best things you can do for yourself if you’re shy about asking women out is to do it until you get over your shyness and hesitation. You have a list of reasons not to do this as long as your arm, but really the best thing you can do for yourself is to just get practice until it becomes second nature.

Ask women out who you think you want to date – choose your targets and just do it. Here’s how:

1. Appear positive, relaxed, and approachable. Greeting her with a nice smile and starting off with a simple “Hi” or “Hello” are simple ways to break the ice.
2. Can’t think of anything to say? Ask her some open ended questions that will allow her to do much of the talking. For example: “What do you think of this class?” can get the ball rolling if you are in school or college. It demonstrates that you are interested in her thoughts and opinions.
3. Realize that you will get shot down sometimes. Everybody does. But you have to start somewhere.
4. Practice. You can do this in front of a mirror, with a recorder or with a trusted friend. Practice asking a woman out that you’ve met before and you at least know a little bit. For example: “I’ve got two tickets for the Red Sox game this Saturday, would you like to join me?” Or, “Have you been to the new Thai restaurant on Third Street? I’m planning on trying it out, but I can’t find anyone else willing to try it – would you like to join me?” She will either say yes, no, or “Oh, I can’t, I’ve made plans for Saturday.”
5. If she says she already has plans, that doesn’t necessarily mean she doesn’t want to go out with you. You won’t know for sure whether she’s making it up or not. Don’t stand there and say, “Well, how about Tuesday, or next Saturday?” because you’ll look desperate. Smile and say, “Okay, well maybe next time.” Be friendly and try again in a few weeks.

You have to be willing to take some risks if you want to date. You are going to get turned down on occasion – just chalk that up to experience and move on. It’s not something you should ever take personally, because not every woman is going to like you and you’re not going to like every woman.

Overcoming shyness around women mainly boils down to practice, practice, and more practice. Another good way to practice is to join an online dating service and send out winks and/or smiles (usually free) to a few women who seem interesting to you. If you get a response, keep a dialog going through email for a bit and get to know her. Then it will be easier to ask her out once you’ve had a chance to discover her interests. After all, she’s most likely a member of the dating service for one major reason – to meet single men like you!