The Worst Times to Break Up with Someone

Typically, you can tell when you’re in a relationship that’s really going nowhere, and you can feel when you’re ready to end that relationship. While it’s always good to know where you stand, it’s also wise to realize when the time of the break up is not right. Obviously, breaking up is never going to be easy, but you can make it even worse by choosing the wrong time to end a relationship.

For instance, birthdays are TERRIBLE times to break up with someone. So if you know that you’re going to end a relationship, please do so well BEFORE his birthday or well AFTER it. If you choose the day before, of, or the day after his birthday to break up, it will always leave a bad feeling with him. Every birthday is going to remind him that his relationship ended at that time. So, if you can manage it, time the break up so that it’s a decent amount of time on either side of his birthday and never, ever make it on the birthday itself.

Another awful break up day is Valentine’s Day. This is the day for lovers and couples to celebrate every year. If you decide to end your relationship on this day, you run the risk of ruining it for him for a very long time, if not forever. That’s why knowing when you’re ready to leave a relationship is a good thing as you can time the break up for a day that doesn’t mean anything to either of you.

Holidays should never be used to end a relationship for many reasons. Obviously, one of them is that this particular holiday may never be enjoyable again if the break up is pretty bad.  Another reason is that some people tend to buy expensive and extravagant gifts during the holidays. If you end your relationship prior to the holidays, you can save both you and your about to be ex-partner a lot of money because you most likely won’t be buying gifts for each other. In addition, the holidays just turn into very sad occasions when a relationship ends during them. This is true of the days immediately before and after them.

The basic rule of thumb is to get your break up out of the way as far ahead of any special day as possible. If you can’t do that, then you should try to grin and bear it through the special day and wait at least a couple of weeks afterward before making the big break. In this way, you’re saving someone a lot of misery that could follow him well into the future. You should be kind about the timing of your break up.

The exception to this rule is if your about to be ex is cheating on you and you just found out, or he’s done something even more horrendous. In cases such as those, he DESERVES to be miserable for future special days.

Signs He’s Taking You for Granted

One of the biggest enemies of relationships is when one or both partners start taking each other for granted. This goes a long way in killing the romance as well as the love between two people. Typically, it’s pretty easy to tell when someone starts to take you for granted. However, if you’re not SURE, but you highly suspect that your partner is taking you for granted, there a few surefire telltale signs that will seal the deal for you.

• He forgets your birthday and/or anniversary: Now, it is possible that your partner was so busy at work or something else was going on that caused him to zone out and forget what day it is. That can happen once in a while but if it happens on a regular basis, he might be taking you for granted.
• He doesn’t care how he looks around you anymore: You know how guys make themselves look and even smell great in the beginning of a relationship. Well, if he stops showering regularly, or brushing his teeth, and lays around in his old, ripped up clothes when he’s just with you, that kind of shows where you fall on his list of priorities. It’s even worse if he dresses up to go out with his friends.
• He doesn’t pay attention to your appearance any more: Granted, once you’ve been together for a while, your man isn’t going to be telling you how hot you look every time you make a little change to the way you look. However, if you put on something slinky and sexy and he still can’t manage to tear himself away from the television, there’s a problem. If he’s not seeing you when you dress up for him, he’s probably taking you for granted.
• He would rather have a night out with the boys rather than one with you: Some guys just need that night out with the guys to blow off steam or whatever. But if he cancels a night out with you to spend it with his buddies at a strip club, you need to be finding out why. On top of it, if he finally finds time to shower, shave and dress up first, then you should really be suspicious. Give him his space at times, but if he’s spending more time with the guys than with you, it’s time to leave.
• If he never helps you around the house, he’s probably taking you for granted: He might have a hard job that tires him out but if he constantly feels that you’re the one that should do everything around the house, including cleaning up after him, you should question it. He may just need a maid and a whore in his life and you fit the bill. Don’t let him take you for granted like that.

Yes, relationships become comfortable and familiar the longer they last. But if he’s showing these signs, it’s time to address the situation. Keep your self-respect in place and don’t let yourself be treated like a second class citizen.

Making Online Dating Less Scary

Online dating has become one of the more popular ways of meeting people for possible romance these days. There are hundreds of thousands of dating websites online now. They cover every type of dating and interacting that you can possibly think of. People join these sites every day and start their search for the perfect companion.

Even though this type of dating has really caught on, there are still some people that find the entire process quite scary. They don’t like the idea of hooking up with someone that they’ve only chatted to over the computer or on the phone. These are the same people that dislike blind dates even when they’re introduced by trusted friends. However, you shouldn’t back away from online dating just because you’re afraid. There are ways to make this experience a lot less scary and a lot more fun.

Decide ahead of time what your personal boundaries will be when it comes online dating. For instance, there may be certain days of the week that work better as date nights for you. If so, you need to stick to those nights even if his schedule doesn’t match yours. Try to work out something for the next week, instead. If he tries to push you for something faster, you may want to drop him because there should be no sense of urgency about a date. He may be looking for something else.

You also need to be yourself on a dating site. Just because you’re meeting someone in a more unconventional way doesn’t mean that you should pretend to be someone you’re not. Remember, whoever you are when you meet someone is who you’ll have to continue to be. That’s why it’s always best to be exactly who you are.

Another thing you need to do is be clear about what you want. If you’re looking for a relationship, then say so. If you just want someone to have sex with, be honest about that, too. Don’t send mixed signals and, hopefully, you won’t receive any in return. When you state the type of relationship that you’re looking for, that will usually stop you from wasting time with someone that wants something completely different.

Make a list of qualities that you want in a potential partner. You’ll probably have trouble finding someone that ticks all the boxes on your list, but if you keep to the most important qualities, that should point you in a good direction. If you’re not TOO particular about what you want, you’ll find someone a lot faster.

Make some dating rules that will keep you safe. Don’t give someone your home address or let him come to pick you up on the first date. Agree to meet at the place of your date as long as this place is well lit and has plenty of people around. Take your own transportation in case you need to make a fast exit. It’s also a good idea to take along your cell phone.

Once you have connected with someone that seems promising, stay true to your dating rules. Don’t meet him until YOU’RE ready. If he isn’t patient enough to wait, he’s not worth your time.

Signs that Your Woman is Cheating on You

Everyone knows that men cheat all the time. It’s almost like it’s in their DNA or something. If it’s genetic, they just can’t help themselves, right?  While that’s probably a lot of nonsense, something else to consider is that women also cheat. They may not cheat quite as much as men, but they DO step out on their men for various reasons. Sometimes they’re better at hiding it than their cheating male counterparts, though. There are signs, however, that you can look for if you think your woman may be cheating on you. They include:

• Accusing YOU of cheating: This is a way of diverting the guilt from herself to you. Even worse, is if you’ve cheated on her before, she may give herself permission to get even with you by cheating. Either way, she knows what she’s done and figures that you may be doing the same thing.
• Starting to look her best when she goes out: When you notice your partner suddenly dressing to the nines when she’s supposedly going grocery shopping or to the gym, you may want to investigate why she needs to look so gorgeous.
• Telling you she needs some space: While this doesn’t always mean she’s cheating, it can mean that she wants you out of the way so she’ll be free to meet a lover.
• Hinting that she’s not happy: If your partner is telling you things like she needs more romance in her life, and that she loves things like getting flowers and love notes, you need to take her seriously. You see, if YOU don’t hear what she’s telling you, someone ELSE WILL.
• Making a new best friend that you’ve never met: In this case, it’s not so much that she’s made a new best friend and you’ve never met this friend, it’s that she’s suddenly spending lots of time with this new friend. In addition, she always has an excuse for why it’s not a good time to meet her.
• Changing her plans at the very last minute: For example, she’s gone out for a night on the town with the new best friend that you’ve never met and calls you around midnight with some excuse for why she’s just going to crash at her friend’s place for the night.
• Your friends are telling you she’s cheating: Of course you don’t want to believe something like that, and she’s told you it’s not true. However, if more than one person tells you they know she’s cheating, it’s probably true.
• Suddenly wanting to keep close tabs on you: When your woman is cheating on you, she needs to make sure that she’s not likely to run into you while she’s doing it.
• Making excuses for not having sex: This should be a huge red flag, especially if she was always raring to go in the past. Now, all of a sudden, she’s too tired, doesn’t feel well, or has the most frequent and longest periods in history.
• Has no interest in the relationship: She probably doesn’t care enough to even argue with you anymore.

You may think that these are all pretty obvious signs of cheating but you would be surprised at how many of them that men actually miss.

Reinventing Yourself to Get Your Ex Back

Breaking up with someone, or them breaking up with you, can be one of the most devastatingly painful events in anyone’s life. There’s no getting around the fact that it hurts, especially if you’re the one that didn’t want it to end. Those relationship breakups that are mutual are actually quite rare, and, most likely, your breakup wasn’t one of these.

You’re probably lying around crying and moping and trying to figure out how to invent a time machine so that you can go back in time and have everything like it used to be. Don’t waste your time and energy on this. Instead, sit up, dry your eyes, wash off your face and get ready to work. You’re going to reinvent yourself so that you can entice your ex back into your arms.

Before you even ask, yes it IS possible to do this even if he’s with someone else. In fact, that’s even better because, then, you can look at her and see what sort of woman he’s left you for. Then take a good long look in the mirror and see what you need to do to make yourself new and improved.

A lot of people get sloppy and unkempt once they’ve been in a relationship for a while. It’s like they get too comfortable and forget to be sexy and attractive for their partner. This is a definite relationship killer. Even if your partner loves you, chances are that he’s not going to love seeing you sitting around with a green face mask on or wandering around the house with your hair unwashed and no makeup.

Do you need to lose a few pounds or simply tone up your body a bit? If so, put yourself on a healthy diet and start working out. That’s not as hard as it sounds, either. You can start off by walking or riding a bicycle, either real or stationary. Just get in some activity so that your muscles can tighten up.

Change your hairstyle and/or color. If you think back, he probably always said there was a color or style that he either liked on you or wanted to see you in. Take advantage of that knowledge and get it done. The next time he sets eyes on you, this will be the hair style and color that he sees.

Take a good look at your wardrobe. Get rid of those sloppy old clothes that, while comfortable, never really did anything flattering for you. If they’re not in your closet, you won’t be tempted to wear them. You can find comfortable lounging clothes that are also sexy and attractive. Your goal is to become well-dressed no matter what the occasion.

Learn to cook the favorite dishes that you never “had time” to mess with in the past. You can bet his new girlfriend is cooking for him often and offering dessert in a way you probably never did. This will have you ready for the first new dinner you cook for him.

All of this time you should have been cutting off all communication with him. Now that you’re ready, the new and improved you should make it a point to “run into him” at a place you know he’ll be. Dazzle him with the new you but don’t be too obvious.  After all, pursuit is half the fun so let him think HE’S winning YOU back.

For more coaching on how to get your ex back, The M3 System is a great resource – if you think you might need some additional help to succeed in getting your ex back, be sure to check out our M3 System review.

Is Your Partner Reliable?

It seems that so many men these days just aren’t reliable, even when in a relationship. There are so many things now that work to distract them. For instance, more and more relationships are ending due to the amount of time that men spend playing video games or computer games. Then there’s the myriad of sports events that are covered by ESPN and if you’re with a sports fanatic, you may as well plan on being alone when the different seasons begin.

Unless you’re also a sports fanatic or love to play video games, you’re going to want to move in another direction because, for you, it’s going to be necessary to be in a relationship with someone that’s reliable. As hard as it may be to face, these types of men are rarely going to be reliable when it means that they’ll need to be away from their sports events or video games. That’s why you must pay close attention while you’re still in the early stages of dating.

A lot of men, in fact most of them, will not show tons of interest in the things that consume their lives otherwise after they first meet someone that they’re interested in. So, it will be up to you to spot whatever you can that tells you a bit about his life. If you spot every video game console made hanging around in his house, chances are that he didn’t buy them simply for decorations. You’ll probably find that he’s also got a pretty impressive collection of games for each of these consoles, too.

Something else you’ll probably want to check is what television channels that he subscribes to. If you see that his guide lists all of the ESPN channels, you’re probably dating a huge sports fanatic. He’s most likely just keeping this part of his personality under wraps until he has you sufficiently baited, hooked and reeled in. He’s probably had issues in other relationships because of all of the avid attachment to video games and sports. So he already knows that it’s going to be a problem.

If you see enough things that have you filled with questions, now is the time to ask those questions and get your answers. The last thing you want to do is get involved with someone that will stand you over in a corner while he spends all of his time slaying virtual dragons and pretending that he’s a football star. This type of man typically has you feeling alone more than anything else.

Think carefully before you get seriously involved with someone that will always let everything else get in the way of things you may need from him. You’ll spend a life of taking care of yourself when you’re sick, forgotten birthdays and anniversaries, and being stood up for important events in your life. It’s much easier to be with someone that’s actually involved in the relationship, too. This is someone that you’ll be able to count in to be there when you need him.

Is There Room in your Relationship for a Baby?

For centuries, it was customary for couples to marry and begin reproducing as soon as possible. In fact, many women were severely depressed if they were unable to conceive and men felt that they had been stuck with a “barren” woman, thereby rendering her defective in some way. Of course, it rarely occurred to most of these men that the fault may rest with THEM and not their wives. At any rate, that’s just how things were. My, how the times have changed.

These days, couples aren’t in quite as much of a hurry to start adding to their family as in days gone by. Most of the time, both partners usually have individual careers that they want to get off the ground.  Since the woman is the one that will need to give her up body and time to the pregnancy and birth, she usually is the one that will have more say so in when the actual reproduction process will begin.

Something else that has become a bit more common is couples that are so into each other that they may not have room in their relationship for a baby. This isn’t to say that they’re selfish or self-involved. It only means that they really love each other and have such a strong bond between them that it may be hard to fit in someone else into the relationship. These couples have planned their lives out for the most part. They like traveling together and they love participating in nightlife activities. Picking and going somewhere at the last minute is also something they love. The spontaneity and the freedom of being able to do things at the drop of a hat is something that doesn’t happen once you’ve become parents.

Admittedly, these freedom loving couples are looked upon as odd, but the truth is, these couples are the ones that know what they want in life and aren’t ashamed or afraid to admit it. Not all couples are meant to be parents. If you and your partner fall into this category, you should be proud and relieved to understand this about yourselves and the sort of lifestyle you want to lead. Couples that know what they want are the happiest in life.

If you and your partner have an active and spontaneous lifestyle that keeps you on the go and keeps you both happy, you may never want to include children of your own in your relationship. There’s nothing wrong with that, either. In fact, when you want your kiddie “fix,” you can always offer to babysit for nieces, nephews and god children. That’s a situation that gives you and your partner some time to enjoy the company of children and gives their parents a much needed break.

If you and your partner have chosen not to become parents, you should be aware that there will always be someone that will be judgmental and be sure that something’s “wrong” with you. Try to be patient with those people because they will most always have closed minds.

Is Worry Ruining Your Relationship?

Everyone knows that there are some people that are just born to worry. These people worry about anything and everything. Some of their worries are legitimate but, for the most part, they worry about things that it really makes no sense to worry about.

To begin with, worry never made anything better. Worry doesn’t solve problems and it saps your energy without making things any different.

When you’ve been mistreated in a relationship, or you’ve had several of them just go wrong for whatever reason, you may have turned into a worrier. You start to worry about whether or not this new or current relationship is going to last. You may also worry about whether or not you’re attractive enough for your partner. There are so many different things that you can worry about within a relationship that you simply don’t know which ones are valid reasons to actually worry.

Something that many people worry about is introducing a new partner to their best friend. There is no shortage of horror stories that depict the best friend swooping in and stealing away the new partner. It’s little wonder that this is one of the top things that people tend to worry about. However, even if you do have “one of those friends” that you’re never sure you can trust, there’s nothing to be gained in becoming paranoid. The best way to handle that situation is to get rid of any friends that you cannot trust. They’re not really your friends anyway.

Do you worry that your partner is out telling some very personal things about you? This has been known to happen on more than one occasion. However, if you can’t trust your partner enough to keep appropriately private things between the two of you, it may be time to stop sharing those sorts of things. That’s rather sad, though, because it means that there are trust issues in your relationships when you can’t confide in your partner without it becoming public knowledge.

The question really should be whether or not you’re finding yourself worrying constantly about everything that MIGHT go wrong in your relationship. You may also be worrying about whatever else may be going wrong in your life, no matter what area it is. If you do find yourself doing that, you may also find that all of this worrying is making you a depressing person to be around. It’s like you suck the energy out of every room you walk into when you carry around all of this worry with you. Not only will you have trouble with getting a successful relationship, but you’ll find that most people will avoid being around you.

It’s very easy to let worry ruin your relationship, especially if you don’t know you’re doing it.  Be brutally honest with yourself and see if you’re one of those worriers. If you are, there’s every chance that you’re putting your relationship in jeopardy. Move forward quickly to take steps that will help you to not worry so much. Try talking things over with your partner so they know you’re not doing this on purpose. Maybe he or she can help you calm down.

How Much Privacy Should Exist in Relationships?

There are many people these days that have been cheated on and betrayed in other ways by their partners. These are the partners that were supposed to love and support them. Yet, they turned out to be little more than sneaky, conniving, cheating and lying pieces of scum that really didn’t deserve what they had. Oddly enough, these same morally deficient individuals will step back and wonder exactly what happened.

If those relationships had been a bit more open, would there have been all of the sneaking around, lying and cheating going on? Maybe, because the ones that are really determined will usually find a way. On the other hand, it may not have turned out to be such a shock to the partner that was wrongly treated. They would have picked up on little hints and clues that their partner was trying to cheat on them.

People that have been mistreated in this way in relationships may find it hard to trust anyone again. For this reason, it may be a good idea to limit the amount of privacy in their next relationship. The idea behind this way of thinking is that you only need total privacy if you have something to hide. Granted, there are SOME things that everyone should have privacy for such as bathroom visits and other intimate things. However, why do you need to be hiding your email passwords from each other? Do you plan to be getting emails that you don’t want your partner to see?

Again, this doesn’t mean that you have to be peering over each other’s shoulders while reading emails. It simply means that there shouldn’t be any need for such strict privacy unless there’s something that you’re hiding from each other. The first thing that comes to mind is that one of you needs to hide online conversations with others.  At least that’s what partners that have been cheated on before may think.  This is one of the primary reasons that couples should be comfortable enough to be completely open with each other.

When you think about it, loving someone should make it unnecessary to keep too many things private from each other. The trust in a really good relationship should be of such a level that neither of you should be worried about what the other one is doing. A truly great relationship will not hold the need to keep passwords secret or other things. When you have a completely open relationship in this way, there will be no need to worry about secrets being kept on either side.

Of course, this type of relationship requires the utmost in trust, which is the sticky part of it all. Therefore, it can be rather difficult to know if you can have this type of relationship, especially when you’ve been betrayed in the past. So you’ll need to be quite careful. Of course, a certain amount of caution is needed in all relationships, especially at the beginning. So, hopefully, you’ll get to know each other to the point where you can have this type of trust. Privacy just isn’t always everything it’s cracked up to be.

When Should You Go Away With Someone for the First Time?

Timing is important in relationships. You need to figure out when you should kiss for the first time, when to cook dinner for the two of you the first time, and, of course, when you should have sex for the first time. These are things that need to be assessed because doing them too fast can ruin a good thing before it even gets off the ground.

It can also be disastrous if you wait too long as well. This can cause doubt in the person that you’re dating as to how you really feel about them. Even though you may have done all of the other things, you may still need to decide when it’s a good time to go away with someone for the first time.

The reason that this is important even after you’ve already slept with someone is because while you may have spent the night with them, going away with someone is a bit different. You’ll be spending a full 2 or 3 days with this person. You’ll be going to bed with them at night and waking up with them in the morning. They are going to see you without makeup and with messy hair. You’re going to be with them when your morning breath is at its very worst. This is a very intimate time and you need to be sure the timing is right for it to happen.

First of all, before deciding if it’s the right time to go away with someone, think about what stage your relationship is at. How many dates have you been on? Have you at least kissed each other? What about sex? Have you had it yet? Is the connection forming and turning into something even deeper?

Obviously, if you’ve just started dating this person, you don’t want to rush things. If you have one date and then suggest a trip away, they are going to think that you’re easy or desperate or both. That’s not the impression you want to give someone that you think may be a promising relationship for you. They might go away with you immediately if they think you’re easy, but you most likely won’t hear from them ever again once you return.

Now, on the other hand, if you’ve been dating for a while, have gotten to know each other pretty well, and have already had sex, it may be time to take things to the next level. If you’re unsure about whether it’s the thing to do or not, talk to them about it and see what sort of reaction you get. Ask them what their thoughts are on the matter. It’s usually better if that first trip away together is a joint decision and not just something that you plan and expect them to go along with.

When you and your new partner have your very first romantic getaway, perfect planning and the perfect time will ensure that it will be a time to enjoy and remember for a long time to come.

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