Dating Success Checklist For Guys

Guys: are you about to go out for a night on the town and plan on (or hope to) bring someone home with you? If so, there’s a handy checklist you should skim before you go out. It will help to impress the ladies and should become a regular part of your dating routine:

• Make Your Bed – Be sure to change the sheets and, if necessary, the blankets and bedspread.
• Clean Your Bathroom – The toilet and the shower, tub and sink should be spotless. Be sure there are plenty of clean towels and don’t forget to make sure there is plenty of toilet paper (remember – women use more than you do!)
• Stock Your Kitchen With Breakfast Food (the kind you can cook) – Bacon, eggs, toast, coffee and juice are the best choices. Muffins are great, and even yogurt is good. Cold cereal is not the coolest thing to offer a woman who has just spent the night in your home for the first time!
• Be Prepared With a Light Snack and Something to Drink (both alcoholic and non-alcoholic) – for that evening as well.
• Prepare Your Answering Machine – Be sure to do one of two things: turn the volume off on the machine and turn the ringer off on the phone, or unplug the phone. If you use an answering machine instead of voice mail anyone in its vicinity can hear the message left when you don’t answer the phone. The last thing you want is for some other woman to be calling and saying something romantic or lascivious, or even worse, some other woman calling you some kind of dog for ditching her while your current date is within earshot!
• Keep Plenty of Condoms Ready by Your Bed (but out of sight) – You want to be prepared but at the same time not looking too eager
• Remove All Traces of Any Left Over Items From Other Women – Make
  sure there are no used second toothbrushes, no earrings or even earring backs, no panties or perfume, and no women’s magazines.
• Clean Your House Top to Bottom – It doesn’t have to be spic and span but dirty clothes should be in the hamper and dirty dishes in the sink – not on the coffee table with the fork stuck to them.
• Wear Clean Underwear And Socks That Are Free of Holes (as your own mother would tell you)
• Dim Your Lights Before You Leave For The Evening – If your lights don’t have a dimmer switch and they’re not three way then pick up some 40-60 watt bulbs and replace your current bright lights. You might have some candles ready for the bedroom, but again don’t bring those out right away.

I’m sure you can think of some other things that belong on this list, but these are the most important things to have on your “dating success checklist” before you head out on a date looking for love and romance.